Hope postponed, grieves the heart (Prov. 13:12a)

Abi and I both stayed at the hospital last night. Yesterday during rounds, the doctors and nurses told us that David was eating well enough for us to go home today or tomorrow. We were obviously excited and relieved that we would be able to have our family together as a whole, in the comfort of our own home. We decided to stay with David through the night to make sure that he continued to eat the required amount.

Well… we are not going home today. Immediately after we were told we might go home, David’s eating began to decrease. Little by little his eating has gone from 60-65 cc’s to our previous feeding at 13 cc’s. The nurse has put his feeding tube back in, and we are tired and disappointed.   Our hope has been postponed, and our hearts are grieved.

I have thought a lot about the time in John chapter 9, that the disciples asked Jesus why a certain man was born blind. Jesus’ answer: God was using the man’s blindness to manifest His works and glorify Himself. While a lot could be said about Jesus’ answer, the underlying assumption that has spoken to me again and again is this: God is the main character in this story.

It is easy for me to process all of this as if I, Abi, Lily, or even David is the main character in our story right now. However, we are just part of God’s greater story of redemption. God is using our lives as well as yours, to manifest Himself to the world in some way. I must remind myself, this is not about me, it is about God receiving the honor and glory that is rightfully His. If that means that we must stay here a while longer, then it also means that God will continue to supply our every need. Life isn’t all about me. If I let my feelings and desires dictate what ought to be, I will live a miserable existence. However, If I can strive to honor God in the wilderness of life, it will be a life well lived.


5 thoughts on “Hope postponed, grieves the heart (Prov. 13:12a)

  1. Meredith

    thankful for your eternal perspective! i will be praying that David will start eating better again soon! we are praying the Lord will continue His sustaining grace and strength and that this will be used for His glory and for your good. love you all.

  2. Nurse Sarah

    “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done.” Phillipians 4:6
    And in a revised version,
    Don’t worry about David, what or how he will eat or drink… consider the birds of the air, the lilies of the field, and the other children in LeBonheur who can’t eat well either…yet God allows them all to be nourished and cared for… one way or another. Don’t worry about tomorrow… tomorrow certainly has enough troubles of it’s own. He is alive, he is thriving, and he can be fed! Easier said than done, I know… but it could be worse.. it could be so much worse. He’ll get home in God’s time.
    Remember, time is a creature of God, to be repected and honored with prayer. Love you guys!!

    1. kathy strevel

      What help even for some of us who only ‘read’ what is going on! And bear one another’s burdens through prayer…Thanks, nurse sarah, from a fellow pilgrim.

  3. BeBe (Debbi Sacran)

    so touched by Meredith and Nurse Sarah’s comments.
    As always, I thank God for your faithfulness, Louis, but as a mom, I feel your dejection as you over ride it with your faith. God has placed HIS mighty hand on you, Abi, Lily and Baby David and I thank HIM that our eyes are open to see just that! I’m so sorry the time to go home was not this weekend. Praying for the time to go home will be soon. And yes…this life is about GOD and I am thankful to be reminded of it through your blog. Love you all and Lord willing, see you Sunday.

  4. Marcus Schallock

    I read these posts daily, or as often as possible, and I am forever amazed at the strength I see pour out of you two. Few people could navigate, or be navigated as you both are, the way ya’ll are. It is an honor to know you both and as I have said many times over these past few weeks, I can think of no better home the Maker could have placed David in on this Earth than with your family.

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