Let me begin this post by telling you it may be a jumbled mess. During the past two weeks I have had so much on my heart and mind. I guess the “so much on my heart and mind” has been the upcoming heart surgery. The past two weeks I felt as if the dread of the unknown was all consuming. I struggled! I cried – ALOT! I whispered constant prayers where I asked God to deliver me from the grasp Satan had on my mind. I begged for strength and grace and mercy. On days where I felt like I might fall apart He “renewed my strength.” He renewed my strength by hearing my three year old, Lily, sing, “Those who wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint. Teach me Lord, teach me Lord to wait.” Lily loves this scripture song. She sings it again and again with gusto and zeal. ¬†As difficult as it is – I have to wait on the Lord. I can’t run ahead to David’s heart surgery – we are not there yet, so the grace for that day isn’t there either. I have to walk day by day, living in the moment, because this is where my grace is found. He has proven Himself faithful in the last 10 weeks of David’s life, and I know He will be faithful in the weeks to come.

Shortly after David was born I began researching various aspects of Down Syndrome. I came across this statistic several times – 92% of women who undergo genetic testing before birth abort their babies if Down Syndrome is suspected. I was shocked by this number. Because I look I David, and he is just my sweet little boy. Perfect. Cute. Big Cheeks. Pretty red lips. Long toes. Red Mow-auk (that has been trimmed twice). Fat rolls on legs and wrist. Smiles and coos. Yawns and stretches. Except for God’s mercy I am no different than the women who chose to end their pregnancies. I have thought about the 92% alot since David’s birth, and I wonder why. Was it the fear of the unknown? The realization that their child would look different, act different? Wouldn’t be “perfect” or fulfill their dreams? The hopes and dreams we have for our children are exactly that – OUR hopes and dreams. They aren’t David’s. I want to and think I am ¬†learning to see beauty with new eyes. At the out-patient surgery clinic, I saw a little girl with club feet, another child strapped in a wheel-chair who could do little except become excited over her daddy’s whispers and kisses. I saw oxygen tanks and ostomy bags and deformities. Before David was born I would have stared and thought, “Oh, that poor mama and daddy.” Now, I look at children who don’t fit into a mold, and I know the potential for all the blessings these children can pour into our lives. I know God has given us blessing after blessing through our Sunshine. I hope I don’t sound preachy, because some days I still wrestle with the new path God has given me to walk. At the end of the day, in all honesty, I can tell you that God brings me to the realization that this is the best path for me to walk.

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I am thankful that God has chosen to reveal Himself to me – that I am among the 8% who will enjoy the miracle of David’s life.

A quick update on David – he is weighing in at 10 pounds, 8 ounces. He continues to eat like a champ. I smile when I warm up his “big boy” bottles. We saw cardiology and received a good report. He looked and sounded well enough that Dr. Lee did not do an ECHO this visit. Our next appointment is in August. We will move towards finalizing surgery plans during this visit. We had a follow-up with Dr. Feliz, and David continues to receive good reports.

Please keep us in your prayers,

~abigail

 

7 thoughts on “

  1. Nurse Sarah

    Sniff sniff… Tear tear- so beautifully said!!! Your faith and hope and trust is contagious- no doubt God is in control and will use that 8% to His glory… After all, all He needs is faith as big as a mustard seed- He has got the rest in His hands. Kisses to you all!!!!

  2. Meredith

    Thank you for sharing! We are still remembering you all in prayer. Thankful for your clinging to Christ and for another reminder that He is always faithful. Love the pictures of the kids! love y’all!

  3. Beth Halverson

    I, too am thankful that 8% even exists. I have been so blessed already by David’s precious life and by the gracious, God-honoring perspective the Lord has given you and Louis. We love you and are continuing to pray.

  4. Heather Ewing

    Such a beautiful post! So thankful & happy that David is in the 8% and that we all will be able to enjoy watching him grow & being blessed as God’s glory is shown through his life! Love you all.

  5. Aunt Wanda

    David is perfect and God has placed him right where he needs to be! God is good all of the time. You continue to inspire me to lean on Him more in my life and try to take each day as it comes.

    We love you all and you continue to be in our prayers.

  6. BeBe (Debbi Sacran)

    this post was not jumbled at all…to say the least, it was precious and jaw-droppingly beautiful!!! I thank and praise God that little David is my grandson and that my children are in that 8 % !!!! God’s gifts are perfect, but I humanly stand in awe at HIS gifts in my life;) I am grateful for my sweet babies! God bless and see you real soon:)

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